Development FAQ: 24+ months – Starting Nursery

How will my daughter of 2yrs 5mths cope at pre-school when she will not follow directions at home?

I am increasingly worried about my daughter who is 2yrs 5mths. She is due to star nursery school in a couple of months but I am wondering if she is really ready. I am trying to get her to follow directions at home such getting ready to go outside or to get ready for a meal, but she just seems unable to do this without me standing over her. She rarely will co operate even though I go at lengths to explain why she needs to get her coat on, or wash her hands. It seems the more I try to explain to her the less she will co operate. I don’t like telling her to do things, so always try to ask and give her an explanation as to why I want her to co-operate. If she is unable to follow my explanations at home which I have time to do how will she cope at nursery school where they may not have so much time to explain things to her but will expect her to follow directions.

Is there anything I can do to make her follow directions better? It worries me that she won’t enjoy her nursery experience as I have not prepared her enough.

It is difficult to know quite how any child will react when they take the first big step outside home and go to nursery school. Getting your daughter prepared is an excellent idea but remember that your home situation is very different from a nursery school. When she is there she will be one of a class of children, all of whom will be following directions, so she is far more likely to co-operate. She won’t have the one to one parent -child struggle either so your worries may be ill founded.

To help her at home, and to prepare her for school where she will be expected to follow simple directions, break things down into easily understood sentences. Although it is good to explain things to young children their level of comprehension means they are not always able to process too much information at one time. Directions which are too vague or long winded will just go over her head and she will tune out your voice. If you ask her to “tidy up this mess” and then launch into a long explanation of why she needs to do so – she may fall over the toys; someone else may fall over them; a visitor is coming; the room needs hovering etc. etc. – you are just giving her too much information. She needs specific directions such as, “Please pick up all the Duplo bricks and put them in their basket”. The Duplo may be spread throughout the jumble but she will be able to focus on this one item fairly well and manage the task. Then move on to another task, such as placing all the books back on their shelf. This will make the job much easier for her and she will able to achieve a lot more than trying to tidy away a jumble of toys and games.

If you want her to get ready to go out ask her to fetch her outdoor shoes or wellies and then help her put them on. Next, suggest she gets her coat. If it is a cold day ask her to find her scarf. If you have organized her possessions in an easy way for her to find them she should be able to do these tasks. You may need to give her some information as to where they are kept but make this easy. Don’t tell her, “Your wellies are in the kitchen” but be specific; ” Your wellies are next to the cat dishes”. Then she will be able to follow your directions through. Tell her in a simple way why she needs her wellies,” We are going to the park so we may find puddles to jump in”; or her scarf, ” The wind is very cold today so it will keep you warm”. That is enough information for her to deal with to be able to follow the direction.

If she still finds it difficult to follow directions try using them when you are playing games with her. Without realising it she will be following them as she is having fun. Set up an obstacle course in your sitting room. Ask her to jump over a cushion, then to crawl through some chair legs, to walk round the sofa and sit on her chair. A simple game of Simon Says is also a fun way to follow directions. Make sure you encourage her with praise when she follows each one.

Keep explaining each direction, but don’t push the issue all the time. Sometimes directions may just need to be followed, “It’s bath time, please get undressed”. If she is reluctant to do this don’t launch into a lengthy explanation but make it fun. Suggest she gets undressed in a different way, “Take off one sock”, “Great”; “Now take off your skirt”, “Well done”; ” Off with the other sock” and so on. Again, she is likely to comply as it will seem as if she is having a game.

There are bound to be times when she will not comply but these should be few and far between if you make a conscious effort to give her manageable directions. At this age she will still need help at times but encouraging her to do things for herself is great. It will certainly stand her in good stead when she is at school.

Development FAQ: 24+ months – Entertaining and Educating your Toddler

I’d like to encourage my son of almost three in imaginative play.

How can I encourage my son, who is approaching three, to be more imaginative? He doesn’t play make-believe as I did as a child.

Using imagination does appear to come more easily to some children than others. Providing your son with some props and ideas may help. Many children have a lot of toys, but not all of them need imagination to be played with. I would suggest giving him a few ideas and see if he can build on them. If he enjoys playing with cars, draw a road plan on a long sheet of paper. This is something you could do together using lining paper which you can find in decorating shops. Discuss with him what he would like on his road and draw some simple outlines. Then find some bricks, either wooden or of the construction variety, and “build” houses and shops along the plan. Just showing him one or two may get his imagination going. Let him take over and then be prepared to offer more suggestions if needed. If he has play people or farm animals they could become part of the layout. Many children have farms, car parks and road mats but making his own will encourage him to think and create a world of his own. Once he is involved in making the scene, leave him to think things through alone.

Providing props for role-play is also something to start thinking about. Pretending to be someone else can be a very powerful experience for a small child. He learns more about himself and others by role-play and pretending. Begin a dressing up box and continue to add to it over the next few years. Again, many children have ready-made fireman, doctor, nurse and police outfits, and possibly a few of their favourite TV heroes as well. But you can further their enjoyment by finding other things to enhance their games. A policeman will need a notebook and pencil and maybe a toy phone. A doctor or nurse needs a medical kit, which your child may already have, but it could be enhanced with a few extras such as bandages and a reel of micropore tape for securing them. Teddy patients need beds, so use old shoeboxes with covers made from cloth napkins. Once you begin to think how to improvise, your son will quickly catch on and copy you.

Ask grandparents for old hats, bags, belts etc as well as donating your own when clearing out. Even things such as old store cards and train passes can be used for make believe play. Given a box of props, many children will readily become a “grown up”, a “daddy” or a “bus driver” and begin to use their imagination in thinking how that would feel.

Small children need room to play. Give them space to set out shops, hospitals or police headquarters. Show them how a blanket over chairs or a table can become a house or a den. While their playthings needn’t take up the whole house, be prepared for some untidiness during the day in certain areas. Let it be understood that things do need to be tidied away at the end of the day, but allow their play to be as uninterrupted as possible until that time. Suggest an area for their den that is not going to be in your way throughout the day, but also where you can keep an eye on what is happening.

One of the best ways to encourage a child’s imagination is to read to him daily and also make up stories yourself. Passing time at the doctors waiting room or when caught in traffic can be fun if you begin to weave a story about the situation. Many parents don’t believe they have this ability, but surprise themselves when they find it is very easy if their audience is a pre-schooler who listens intently to every word.

Development FAQ: 24+ months – Entertaining and Educating your Toddler

My son of almost three is always trying to help me around the house. This can be frustrating at times but I don’t want to discourage his helpful nature. What things could I let him do on his own whilst I get on with my jobs?

My son of almost three is always trying to help me around the house. He will follow me around wanting to do what I am doing. At times I let him help, although it is frustrating when he insists on hanging onto the vacuum when I am trying to get the rooms cleaned quickly. Should I be encouraging him to help and what sort of things could I expect him to be able to do by himself so I can get my own jobs done.

Although as adults we are inclined to consider housework as a chore which needs to be done quickly there are so many possible learning experiences in household tasks which you can offer a small, willing helper who sees helping you as fun.

It may take a little longer for you to get the house cleaned if you allow your son to help, and things may not look quite so perfect when he has finished, but you are teaching him so many things it is worth letting him join in as much as he wants to.

Helping around the house gives a child a sense of responsibility. Doing “chores” is a good way to help a child understand how a family works, where everyone takes their share of helping to keep their home neat and tidy.

If your son likes to be with you as you do your jobs look at each room and find something you can get him to do there which will help you work through the house more quickly.

It is never too soon to teach a child to take a pride in his surroundings. Help your son to make his own bed each day. If he uses a duvet then show him how to shake it out by holding the corners and smooth it into place. As well as his own bed your son can help you with yours.

If you have piles of laundry to put away get your son to help you sort it out. He may like to sort his own washing into different categories such as pants, socks and vests. Show him how to fold them up and, if his drawers are at a suitable height, encourage him to put the things away. Again, he can be set to sort out your laundry if he wants to whilst you get on with another job. Most small children take this kind of task very seriously and will be happy to take some time over it.

If your son enjoys dusting show him how to pick up an article and dust underneath it. He will love to help you polish as well as it is a satisfying task. Use a solid wax-based product which you show him how to apply. If he wants to use spray cleaning products himself teach him he must always do so with you close by to avoid any accidents. Also, give him a duster to clean his room with. He will be happy to get into all the corners and under the radiators providing they are not very hot.

You could also show your son how to clean the taps in the bathroom. Providing you use child friendly sprays, or put on the cleaning product yourself first, he should enjoy washing off the cleaner and then having a second cloth to dry and polish the taps. You may need to keep an eye on him if he is using water so the floor is not flooded but show him ways to prevent this from happening. If you treat your son in a grown up way, praising him for his help and ability to make things clean and tidy, you will find he is less likely to make it into a game and cause more mess. He will feel that he is doing important grown up work and so will probably take great care over it. Telling him what a great job he is doing will encourage him to continue.

You will probably spend much of your day in the kitchen. This is one room where your son can really be encouraged to have areas of responsibility. Provide him with a low cupboard or shelf for his own dishes and plates. Teach him how to lay the table for you. If you show him the correct way to hold cutlery and plates, explaining why this is so, he will try very hard to copy you. If you constantly tell him to be careful and warn him about dropping things accidents are more likely to occur than if you give him the responsibility he wants, being involved in the day to day running of your home.

Show your son chores such as emptying the dishwasher. If your cupboards are too high for him, do this chore together; he can hand you items which belong in places he is unable to reach. Encourage him to keep his own crockery neat on his shelves.

Washing up is an activity most children enjoy. By thinking about how you can provide for this he will enjoy scrubbing at bowls and cutlery, perhaps at the end of a baking session. Let him stand on a small, firm stool so he can reach the sink properly and provide him with a waterproof apron.

Make sure you always thank your son for any help he has given you so he feels valued and will want to help you again.

If you show your son how to do things and provide him with the proper equipment he should be able to help you in many ways around your home. You are teaching him valuable life skills. “Chores” can become just that when we have to perform them day in and day out but to a child they are fun. Everything he does, from sorting out socks to laying a table, is helping him develop. Without realizing it, a child learns many of the basic concepts of maths. and science as he helps you around the home. You are teaching him to be both responsible and independent. It may take a little longer to get the house cleaned but the time you are spending together, talking and working, is invaluable.

Development FAQ: 24+ months – Entertaining and Educating your Toddler

When is it safe for children to help cook? My son of 2yrs 4mths always wants to help me.

When will it be safe for my children to cook with me? Sophie is 13 months and Ben is 2 years 4 months. They are always wanting to “help” in the kitchen, but I am worried about them having accidents.

Deciding when children are ready to help in the kitchen really depends on what you are doing. Some everyday tasks, such as peeling and slicing, are beyond them, but there are plenty of things they can do. Ben can fetch vegetables and dry ingredients for you, if they are stored in a place he can reach. Both children can be given a wooden spoon and allowed to stir ingredients in a bowl, even if it is just breaking up mince prior to you cooking it. Helping to decide how to decorate their pizzas for tea is also something they will enjoy. Food preparation may take a little longer with two extra pairs of hands, but your children will gain immense satisfaction in being allowed to help.

Showing Ben the correct way to cut will come in a few months, although using a plastic picnic knife to cut lettuce or banana could well be within his scope now. Point out the dangers to him, but try not to be over-protective as most small children take the responsibility of helping very seriously.

Letting toddlers cook for pleasure can be a great rainy day activity. One of the easiest activities is making cakes. Keep some ready-made cake mix in the cupboard. Sophie can join in the stirring with a wooden spoon and Ben can manage whisking the milk and egg together. With some help, they can both spoon the mixture into cake cases and decorate them when cooked. Don’t worry about trying to get a perfect result – the cakes will still taste good even if they are misshapen!

If you wish to cook from scratch, then find a simple biscuit recipe. Remove butter from the fridge in advance to make creaming easier. Divide the mixture into two, and give each child a bowl and spoon. Alternatively, use ready-made shortcut pastry to roll out and cut into circles to fit tart tins. Sophie may need help with a cutter, but Ben should easily mange this. Use for jam tarts or mix up a savoury filling of egg and cheese. Child-sized rolling pins and plastic cutters are preferable. With encouragement, Ben will also enjoy helping to wash up. Just make sure he is standing securely at the sink and is well protected with an apron.

There are a lot of children’s cookbooks and equipment around – just adapt the ideas for your young chefs. Encouraging your children to help in the kitchen can be great fun, as well as providing opportunities for counting, measuring and weighing.

Development FAQ: 24+ months – Entertaining and Educating your Toddler

How do I provide messy art play at home for my 2 year old?

We have recently moved to the country. I have tried in vain to look for an art group suitable for my two-year-old daughter. In her previous class, she loved painting and sticking, and I had none of the mess to cope with. I know I should allow some of these activities at home, but I don’t know how to go about providing for them without spending a lot of money on materials. Apart from enjoying herself, is it important for her development that she has these kinds of activities now?

The thought of providing for messy play at home does intimidate some mothers, but pre-planning helps. Plenty of the materials you need in the early stages can be found around the house. Start saving small boxes and packets for junk modeling. Large cereal packets can be flattened and used for finger painting. Cut the top off a plastic lemonade bottle and invert into the rest of the bottle for a non-tip paint pot. Play dough can be made at home – there are plenty of recipes in craft books for the under-5’s.

Take a trip to a store specialising in young children’s playthings and buy three colours of paint. Begin with the primary colours; yellow, blue and red. Easily washable paint is available. Add three stubby brushes, some non-toxic glue sticks and a large pad of paper. With these basic items your daughter can begin to have some fun.

Cover her in a grown up shirt worn back to front with the sleeves rolled up or cut off at the right length. Plan your creative sessions when you can devote some time to being with her and when neither of you are tired. If the kitchen floor is due to be washed, you won’t mind a few splashes and it can be part of the clearing up afterwards. Let her paint on a rainy afternoon and pop her into the bath before tea.

Keep all the art materials out of reach and sight, but do make the effort to provide some kind of activity every few days, especially in the winter when being outside may not be so possible. Cover all the surfaces with newspaper or large pieces of PVC cloth kept especially for the purpose. Make sure your daughter is sitting at the right height at a table or let her loose on the floor which has been well protected.

Her first paintings will be of the up and down, round and round kind, but show her how to change brushes for each colour and talk about the resulting colours which emerge from the three primary colours. Early art work is not meant to be recognised as anything. It is the “doing” which is interesting to her. She will be well past three before the concept of “painting a picture” will occur to her. She may prefer to use her hands instead of a brush. With ready mixed paint this is an ideal occupation. Use cardboard if she wants to do this, as it won’t tear as easily as wet paper.

By all means join in her sessions, but try not to show her too much. Exploring the medium for herself is much more meaningful. As she becomes older and her hand co-ordination improves, introduce stamping – potatoes cut in half, leaves, plastic cotton reels and countless other household items can be painted and then stamped on to paper. On a day when you are not so inclined to have a lot of clearing up, provide “sticking”. Keep old greetings cards and cut out the pictures ready. Newspaper colour supplements, old magazines and catalogues will provide plenty of interest. If you wish to add some extras, small pieces of material, lace and braid, along with sparkly paper and gift ribbon are all effective. Provide a flat surface, well covered and show her how to use the glue stick. She may stick things upside down or the wrong way round, but again it is the actual “doing” which is helping her refine her hand to eye coordination, fine hand movements and sense of colour, pattern and form. Even a large pad of cheap paper and a packet of washable felt tips can provide an opportunity for her to be creative. Displaying work can also be fun and rewarding for your child. A pin board or fridge magnets are all that is required, and keep the display fresh by changing the work frequently for all to admire.

It may seem daunting, but providing different mediums for your daughter to explore can be a satisfying part of parenting, despite the clearing up at the end. But involve her in that too, as to her it is all part of the fun!

Development FAQ: 24+ months – Entertaining and Educating your Toddler

How can I help my three-year-old learn to use scissors?

My three-year old becomes very frustrated when using scissors. She usually ends up with torn paper. How can I help her?

Using scissors is a skill some children find hard to master, as the blades must be at a 45 degree angle to the paper to cut efficiently. Many children of this age enjoy cutting for its own sake. To help them master this skill prepare some cutting strips. Use round-ended metal bladed scissors rather than plastic ones. By three you may be aware that your child is left-handed. If you think she is, left handed scissors can be bought from shops specialising in young children’s playthings.

Use thin card rather than paper to begin with. Recycle card from tissue boxes, food packets etc. Flatten any boxes and use the unprinted side. Make the strips about 20-25cm long and 16cm wide. Using a ruler and thick felt-tip pen, draw straight lines about 4cm apart. Show your child how to hold the card with one hand whilst cutting with the other following the line.

As she becomes more proficient, draw wavy lines then zigzags. Once she has mastered this, give her old greeting cards to cut. Use ones with definite outlines so she is able to see where to cut. It won’t be long before your child can cut out on paper, as she has acquired the skill of holding scissors at the right angle.

Development FAQ: 24+ months – Entertaining and Educating your Toddler

How do I teach my daughter of 2.5 yrs the alphabet?

Is two-and-a-half too young to learn the alphabet? My daughter is interested in the letters in her books.

Learning to recite ABC is only one part of understanding how letters work. Teaching your daughter that each letter has a sound will prepare her for learning to read in the future. Use an ABC book with simple clear pictures reading it with letter sounds rather than names. By all means teach her the order of the alphabet; there are several songs which do just this. Knowing the order of the letters will be important in the future too. How else do we find names in a directory?

Show your daughter that letters and print are all around her. Point out street signs and food packets as well as looking for known letters in books.

You can make up simple games to play at odd times in the day. “How many things can you see that begin with ‘a’?”, using the sound and helping her to begin with. It is important to keep sessions short and fun so she doesn’t become bored or put off.

Use letter shaped cutters to make biscuits, serve alphabet pasta shapes and buy a set of magnetic letters and a board to play with. All will reinforce her learning.

Make an alphabet book of your own. Find pictures in magazines and use a scrapbook for your daughter to stick them in. She can help find and sort the pictures as well as sticking in. Label in small case letters, as children learn these first when at school.

There are several books for parents about teaching these pre-reading skills, which will give you many ideas. Look in the educational section in the children’s department of a large bookstore.

Development FAQ: 24+ months – Entertaining and Educating your Toddler

I am expecting my second baby in six weeks’ time. My older son, Fred, is two and a half, and has been attending nursery since September. We have talked to him about the baby constantly, but he never shows much interest, and I am concerned about how he will react when the baby arrives. He has been the centre of our universe since he was born, and while in every respect he is a contented little chap, I do worry that he doesn’t cope well with change. For instance, he loves nursery now, but it did take three to four weeks for him to settle down.

Having a second baby brings about many changes in the family that will affect everyone, including your first child. It is a wonderful time for you all, but you are right that toddlers do not like change. There is no perfect age gap between children, but it is generally thought that at around two and a half years, any jealousy they feel is less pronounced. Your child is beginning to have a growing sense of independence, and is unlikely to be threatened by the new arrival. Fred is at a super age to enjoy a new baby. Don’t be surprised that he is showing little interest at the moment. It is natural, since at present he can’t imagine what it will be like to have a baby in the house.

It is a benefit that he has a happy nursery to go to. This will give him a certain security and continuity to his day. It is also a world which is unaffected by the new arrival. Do continue to talk to your little boy about his new brother or sister, and what will happen when the new baby arrives. Make sure that you have explained to Fred where Mummy and Daddy will be when the baby arrives, and who will be looking after him. Encourage him to ask questions, and talk to him about his friends who have had new baby brothers or sisters. Reassure Fred that he will still be able to do the things he enjoys – playing with his trains, going to the park, seeing his friends at nursery etc.. Even if it appears that he is taking no notice, on one level you are preparing him for the change. There are some super illustrated books dealing with a new baby in the family, which can help an older child understand.

Try to involve Fred in plans for the arrival of the new baby. Encourage him to do things for himself when possible, such as putting his shoes and coat on. This will make life a little easier for you when the baby arrives, and it will encourage Fred’s sense of independence.

If you have not already moved Fred from his cot to a big bed, think carefully before doing this now. Ideally a toddler needs two to three months to get used to new sleeping arrangements before the baby arrives. This is a special event in Fred’s life and should not be connected to the arrival of the new baby.

Development FAQ: 24+ months – The Social Toddler

My 2-year-old daughter is very clingy. When we go to friend’s houses she’ll sit on my lap the whole time, while the other children her age play. (I don’t try and force her to integrate as I feel that could be damaging). I dread to think how she’s going to react if I try and leave her in the crèche that she’s booked into for our ski holiday in January next year. I also worry that it will be very hard for her when she starts nursery school, or if a new baby arrives. Naturally, her dependence on me leads me feeling hopelessly guilty (about returning to work, or leaving her with anyone else). After all, there must be a reason why’s she’s lacking confidence and clinging to me. Or is it just regular, contrary 2-year old behavior? Do you have any suggestions as to what I can do?

I do think that some children, particularly those of a more sensitive nature, do go through a clingy stage around this age. The important thing is not to feel guilty or believe that it is something which you are doing wrong that is making her behave in this way. It is much better to put your energy into giving her lots of love and reassurance, and ensuring that you take some positive action to help your daughter overcome her clinginess.

I think that for a couple of weeks it would be advisable to arrange smaller play dates with only one or two other mothers and children. This might be better than taking her to larger groups where she may feel intimidated or threatened by children who are more confident and boisterous. It sometimes helpful to have a child slightly older than her own age, since she/he will already learned the skills of sharing and playing together. It is also important that when you first start doing this that you and the other mum join in the play with your children, instead of just watching them. For some children playing does not always come naturally and is something that they have to learn. This is often easier for them if done in smaller groups. Once your daughter becomes happy to play alongside you in a smaller group situation her confidence will increase and she should become less clingy. You can then start to leave the room for short spells, gradually increasing the time you are out of the room, by a few minutes at a time.

Another good way of helping prepare your daughter for playing with other children, is encouraging role-play games with her teddies and dollies. Try creating a character for each of her teddies and dollies – the funny one, the noisy one etc; and one who is a bit shy and does not play with the other teddies and dollies. For example Barney the Bear is a bit shy, particularly when Tommy the Tiger is around. But you talk to Barney and explain that Tommy is a bit of a rascal and too noisy at times, but he’s a nice tiger really. As you encourage Barney and Tommy to play together, give Barney lots of encouragement saying how clever he is and such a good boy playing with Tommy. Include your daughter in the role-play, by saying things like “doesn’t Barney look really happy today playing with Tommy, and what a clever big boy he is”. Do a star chart for Barney so that each day your daughter can see how much fun Barney’s life is becoming as he starts to play with the other toys more.

This will prepare your daughter for the introduction of a star chart when you start and take her back to larger groups settings. She will have learnt through the role play with her toys, that play dates can be lots of fun.

When dealing with this problem it is important to remember that it is just another stage in her development, it is not a reflection of how her whole life is going to be. Try not to feel guilty, or that you are doing something wrong. Children of this age are so sensitive, and if you approach each play date feeling anxious, she will most certainly pick up on it and become even clingier. It may take a little time, but try to stay relaxed about her clinginess. Having watched so many children of the age go through the stage, I can assure you that things will improve.

Development FAQ: 24+ months – The Social Toddler

My daughter is three years and eight months. She is very shy and hides behind my legs even if we meet someone we know in the street. I try to get her to speak to them but she refuses. I feel really angry and ashamed when she does this and a really bad mother. Why can’t she be like other children her age? Have I done something wrong and if so how can I help her now?

First of all let me reassure you that you have done nothing wrong and you are not a bad parent. Your anger and shame are understandable because it is normal to want our children to behave in an appropriate manner. However your shy child is unable to see things from your point of view. When she feels that she is the centre of attention she will hide behind you. Some Psychologists believe that there is a possibility that shyness is caused by a combination of factors which include genetics and personality. Other suggested causes are learned behaviour from perhaps a shy or overprotective parent, being bullied by siblings or fear of failure and because of their shyness may have reduced self-esteem.

Whatever the reason there are several things you can do and the following suggestions may help but how successful they are will also depend on your daughter’s personality:

  • It is important to avoid labelling your daughter as shy because labels tend to stick and make children feel less positive about them-selves.
  • Try to prevent other people calling her shy either.
  • When she is displaying shy behaviour support her by acknowledging her feelings instead of trying to cajole her out of it.
  • Tell her stories about times when you have felt shy and what you did that helped during these times. Telling children about our experiences helps them to feel better and helps to reduce their anxiety.
  • Try to be confident and outgoing. Children learn from the behaviour of their parents and model that behaviour.
  • Coping strategies can be worked at with your daughter by role playing situations, but make them interesting and fun.
  • Discussing situations with your daughter before the event as if you are talking to yourself – saying where you are going, what you are going to do, what you expect it to be like and how you will behave when you get there. Have a chat about how it went when you come home discussing together how both of you felt it went.
  • Notice when your daughter smiles or says hello to another child and praise her for small improvements.
  • Notice the things your child does well and encourage them with praise and support.
  • Invite some friends she would like to be friends with to your house to play.