Sleeping FAQ: 6-9 Months – Settling/Sleep Associations

My baby son, aged 7 months, is following the CLB routines really well and is sleeping and feeding at the recommended times, but he is still crying down for 5-10 minutes before each sleep. We have tried introducing some books at bedtime and a lullaby light, but these just seemed to make him more excitable. As yet, my husband and I have not had a night out together, as we are reluctant to leave him with a babysitter. My mother has offered to babysit but has made it clear that she will not leave him to cry for more than a few minutes. Do you think that the crying down will start to reduce in the near future or is this something that could go on for months, and are there any other rituals that I could introduce to help reduce the crying down ?

Although it can be very stressful to hear your baby cry when he is ready to sleep, please try and take some comfort from the fact that once asleep he sleeps so well. Some babies continue to cry down for five to ten minutes during the first year, and we are sure that you will find that the crying down will decrease over the next few months and will eventually stop altogether. Over-stimulation and over-tiredness can cause some babies to fight sleep when put in the cot, so we would recommend that you try bringing your baby’s bedtime forward by ten minutes in the evening.

We would also suggest that you try the following idea, to create a new bedtime ritual that works for many babies. It helps create a very calm, but simple bedtime routine, giving the right signals that it is sleep time. Prior to putting your son in his cot choose two or three of his cuddly toys to say goodnight to. Each night, using a very calm, positive voice and a happy expression, follow the same procedure of kissing the cuddly toys and saying “night night” to each one as you lay them down flat to sleep on a nearby chair or surface.
After saying goodnight to the toys, it is important that you immediately settle your baby in his cot. Lay him down, using the same words and expressions to say “night night ” to him, as you did with the toys. When you settle him in his cot and leave the room, it is important that you do so on very positive note, so that he is aware of and picks up the happy vibes. Even if he is fussing slightly, try to remain calm – confident that what you are doing is right.

You can also use the same procedure at naptimes.

Once you have established this new method of settling your baby, we would suggest that you get your mother to watch you (quietly in the background) before you ask her to babysit. Once she has seen how well he settles after his “cry down”, it should give her the confidence to follow the same procedure. It is important that you explain to your mother that if she does not allow him this short period of crying down, he may well be unsettled for several hours, which will make him overtired and would be of no benefit to anyone.

With any bedtime routine, it is important to be consistent and to have confidence that what you are doing is what is best for your son. Many babies of his age are still waking several times a night and crying on and off for hours during the day, so you should take heart that your baby is well settled and happy in his routines – doubtless due to your calm, confident and loving parenting.