Sleeping FAQ: 18-24 Months – Early Morning Waking

My son wakes early and is tired but resists going back to sleep.

My son will be two next month and I am having problems with him not sleeping enough at night. He will only sleep for about 9.5 hours and then wakes up still very tired but we just can’t get him to return to bed. Even as a young baby he never slept for the full 12 hours but would do about 11; he was fine on this though. He is a very good eater and has milk first thing, then a big breakfast, snack, protein lunch, snack and carbs for dinner then milk before bed. He also has a nap after his lunch during which time he would happily go for 2-3 hours although I do wake him up after 1-1.5 hours. He is also getting quite hard to put down for his nap and some days will miss it completely. This happens on average once or twice a week. He goes to bed around half seven and is not a problem to put down. He will either pass out straight away or chat to himself for 20 minutes or so depending upon how tired he is. However he always wakes about 9.5 hours after he is put down. We have tried altering his bedtime but it doesn’t seem to matter how early or late it is; he still only sleeps for the same amount of time. For example yesterday, when he had no nap, he woke after the same amount of time and was so tired this morning but I spent an hour trying to get him back to sleep and he just wanted to get up. He is obviously quite whiney and whingy when he doesn’t get enough sleep but I just can’t seem to help him go for longer. 6am is now feeling like a lie in which is pretty horrific for us!

Your son may well need slightly less sleep than the average two year old. But the problems of becoming chronically overtired and sleep deprived may arise if he continues to cut back on his daytime nap as well as waking early in the morning. His last sleep cycle of the night will be of light sleep. Any small disturbance could rouse him from this light sleep and he will be awake. Look at his room to check for anything which may be disturbing him, such as chinks of light around the curtains or doorframe. Make sure he is warm enough if sleeping in a bag. He may need a long-sleeved vest or pyjama top on underneath to prevent him from waking up cold. Once you are sure there is nothing in the room waking him look outside. Is the sound of early morning traffic likely to start around the time he has been waking? Or do you have a boiler which kicks at this time? It can be easy to overlook the noises we accept as normal by day. In the quiet of the early morning they are enough to rouse a child from a light sleep.

Is your son used to you responding to him as soon as he wakes? Have you tried to leave him for 15-20mins to see if he will settle himself again? If he is used to seeing you as soon as he wakes you will need to put some sleep training into place to get him more used to settling back himself. If his room is dark and warm enough and he is still tired he could well doze back again to nearer 7am before properly waking. To get him used to staying in bed you must be firm and consistent in how you manage these early wakings. Go into him after 15-20mins and lay him back down in his cot if he is standing. Tell him it is still night time and he must lie down. Use the same short sentences every morning so he will know what to expect. Leave him and do not re-enter the room again for another 15-20mins. You may well have to go through several mornings of crying but your son needs to learn how to settle himself back to sleep when he is half awake at this time in the morning.

Continue to put him down for his lunchtime nap at 1pm. Even if he does not sleep at this time he will be having an hours rest in his cot which he will need if he is full of energy like most two year olds are. If you are aware he is not asleep then get him up after an hour but make sure that he settled in bed earlier than 7.30pm that night. If he falls into a deep sleep at 7.30pm as soon as he is in bed he is more likely to wake early. It would be better to gradually move his actual bedtime back to nearer 7pm so he chats himself to sleep in 15-20mins. You can do this by moving it back by 5 mins every 3-4 days. Moving things slowly like this is more likely to be effective than making a jump of half an hour in one stretch. Some small children go through a phase of needing an earlier bedtime two or three times a week. Depending on his lunchtime sleep you may have to adjust things in the evenings, but always be aware of your son becoming over tired. Have a calming bath and bedtime routine to help him settle down in plenty of time in the evenings. It can take up to two weeks for a child’s sleep cycles to readjust themselves so you must be persistent and consistent in how you deal with your son for quite a while before you may really see the results.