At six weeks old my daughter is unable to settle at 7pm
My daughter is fine during the day, feeding and sleeping according to your routines, but she will not settle at 7pm. We have tried giving her more milk in the evenings, thinking she may be hungry, and we have tried to vary her afternoon nap, but it doesn’t seem to work. She feeds well between 10 and 11pm and will usually sleep through to 6/7am. It is, however, extremely difficult to keep her awake until 9am and she often takes her morning nap between 8.30 and 9.30am. She then sleeps at 11.30am- 2pm and 4.15-4.45pm.
When we put her in her cot at 7pm she sometimes settles, but within twenty minutes she is crying. We then wait ten minutes before going in to settle her. Sometimes by this point she has temporarily stopped crying, but if we don’t go in and she starts crying again five minutes later, should we wait another ten minutes before going in? We have also tried putting her to bed earlier in case she is overtired, but that hasn’t worked either.
My daughter is breastfed. She feeds at 7am 20 minutes one side, 15 minutes second side; 10.15am 20 minutes both sides; 2pm 20 minutes both sides; 5pm 20 minutes one side; 6.15 20-45 minutes second side; 10pm 20 minutes both sides. She weighed 9lbs 2oz last week.
One of the most common reasons why a young baby will not settle at 7pm is hunger. As you are exclusively breastfeeding your daughter, your supply by 6.15pm could be low. This is a very common problem with breastfeeding mothers, as it is difficult to rest between feeds, especially in the afternoon when you want to be out and about. One way you can help yourself is to feed your daughter at 5pm, giving her both sides, and then offering her an expressed feed at 6.15pm. This milk could either be from a freezer supply, or if you decide to give a bottle feed on a regular basis, then refrigerate your milk expressed in the morning and offer this to her after her bath. She will probably need around 2-3oz, having fed from you an hour before. By taking a good feed at this time your daughter should be more able to settle herself.
On p 26 of The Complete Sleep Guide there is a section about settling a young baby. You are quite right to leave your daughter about ten minutes before going in to her the first time, but as the Sleep Guide explains, if she is becoming more distressed, then always pick her up and offer more food. Young babies are tired by this time of day and may not take a full feed before becoming sleepy, yet they are not full enough to settle properly to sleep. Once resettled, give your daughter another five to ten minutes before going in. With a baby this young it is not advisable to leave her crying for anything longer than ten minutes, unless you are aware that the crying is really beginning to diminish and she is obviously going to settle. If this is the case, then wait another five minutes before quietly looking into the room to check that she is settling herself down.
The amount of sleep your daughter is having in the day is not excessive, often another reason for unsettled evenings. Providing she is well awake by 5pm, having had a short afternoon nap, she should be ready to sleep at 7pm. Turning to the morning routine, a baby of this age may not be able to stay awake beyond 8.30am. As she gets older this will gradually happen, and providing she manages to stay awake until 11.30am then settles easily for her lunchtime nap, you will have no real problems. If, however, she begins to sleep for only 45 minutes at 8.30am, then she may need an extra 15-20 minutes around 10.45am to help her get to 12.15/12.30pm and still be able to sleep for a longer stretch at this time; page 136 of the Contented Little Baby Book explains this fully.